disclaimers: the "bear with me" logo was supposed to be more in the middle, but dreamweaver is absolute shit. Also some of the fonts were meant to be a bit bigger, but again, Dreamweaver really is massively shit and won't increase the size as told to. cheers

5/12/11 The FINAL telos album, it's finally here! You can download by clicking just there to your left, just there. It's MARVELOUS, and you'll demand him back to do more. 28/08/11 NEW DiW single is here! free-ish download, if you want, at : http://www.dressedinwires.co.uk/acidpeel.htm 12/06/11 Oh heck, a new Telos EP. It's free download, or you can buy the FANCY PHYSICAL VERSION from the shop, with confusing case mechanism. HERE's a video! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=brKiRQwh6kk 06/06/11 Oh Lord, the new Dressed In Wires LP is now available. see our shop. It's the second part of the 4-part Exhibits collection, very limited edition. 30/01/11 Oh, a new DiW release. First of two this month. FREE DOWNLOADS FOR A WEEK FOR ALL! HERE!! www.dressedinwires.co.uk/c90 19/11/10 Some links for you. FIRST UP: DiW on the Moira Stewart remix album: http://www.distractionrecords.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=117 NEXT UP: new single, a video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBGHFtE8xAQ ENJOY SELFS 09/01/10 Alright, the new album DIWFTW is available for cheeky download prior to official release.... probably only going to be an mp3 version for this, so head to the albums page and click on the link to get too its. 26/09/09 NEW SINGLE TIME AGAIN FAWKS: Yamamba...*The*Crash*Is*The*Cannibal* is out on 7th december. free download. download. tell your frendz. they download. watch the video. tell your frendz about the video. they watch video. everyone goes out and buys subsequent album. THAT HOW WORK 20/09/09 New song out soon thanks to Seed Records... them foooools... watch this boxxxx.... 13/07/09 Oh yes, hot track action, an exclusive number on the Fuckin' Amateurs label's "50" box-set compilation. many discs of noise and filth. Don't ask me where it get it from, no idea? get in touch and i'll put you in touch best i can. 09/05/09 11th May is your date for TWO NEW RELEASESUS. The Mice Taster EP, and the Embers Trilogy. Head to the releases page for info and buying options, for you WILL BUY. 13/04/09 YES YESY ESY YES it's time for a new DiW single!! And Observe This New, Curious Beast : available FREE for 2 weeks : http://www.megaupload.com/?d=STCUAX37 22/02/09 Hot Momma Mia! The DiW back catalogue is now up for sale as MP3, for those of youse into that kind of thing. Gan to the Releases page for some saucy links to our shoppe, it's all very reasonably priced, but not as nice as owning real things. 21/10/08 NEW RELEASES IMMINENT! go to that thar listen page for a link to some tasty teaser trailer action... 18/06/07 Bristol gig cancelled, sadly. BUT Newcastle peeps in for treat: End Bar, 2nd July, supporting Errors. First outing for the BRAND NEW DIW LAPTOP which won't break at all. 13/10/2007 New release alert!! The Valves n Shit n Valves EP will be out, 19/11/07, or more likely before that. Check the Releases page for fun times! 25/09/2007 Durham gig cancelled! Due to unfortunate circumstances the october fun in Durham has had to be postponed for everyone. But there'll hopefully be DiW action when it gets rescheduled, so be cool! Watch this space, not that much happens in the space. 31/08/2007 Laptop Hosital! Oh eck, the DiW famous laptop is porrly, and has a big crack in her face after some public abuse, t'was an accident officer! The girl should be up and running OK soon enough, so no gigs hopefully be affected. 25/5/2007 It's the 28th May, is the day you want!!! fakeindielabel.co.uk for the EXCLUSIVE FREE DOWNLOAD SINGLE ! 12/5/2007 DEID EXCITING NEWS for those few waiting patiently for the next DiW album. "Prettier Horse to Ride" is coming in July, on Fake Indie Label! OH MAMA MAMA 10/04/2007 Trawled like a fat kipper! http://www.hecklerspray.com/myspace-trawl-dressed-in-wires/20067780.php 20/03/07 Yes, yes! If you can find the SECRET TREATS page, you'll see that there is a whole classic alubum for you to download for nowts! 02/02/07 Gumpters! Lordy me, a BRAND NEW DiW site design at long last!!!!1! Have a look around and have your fancies tickled. BTW, apologies to Netscape/Firefox users, woofters that you are. Perhaps one day this site will be optimised enough for you to view it properly. Till then: Tough. 30/01/07 Check out the sexy new jukebox on the Listen page, it's a corker, it's a porker, it's a midnight mawker 23/01/07 a veritabe PLETHORA of new gigs flooding in. Guess which page to look at, go on, just guess 15/01/07 New year, New studio album for DiW on its way. Relase date... ohhh, March maybe? 16/10/06 See the secret TREATS page (hidden! you have to find it! excitement!) for an exclsive DiW live set download, tasty, tasty. 10/09/06 See the GIGS page for details on where you can get funky with an exclusive live set from DiW on the radio.............. get wid it 08/09/06 Girls! Boys! The cassette single ET GETTING SUCKED OFF FOR HARRY should be out in all good record shops from this monday! Gan seek! 01/09/06 More gig action: DiW at the seaside! see the GIGS page. 04/08/06 Man, You're STILL no lookin' out! Check out the new Fake Indie Label compilation out on 7/8/06. 16 of the very finest tracks of stuff, there's an exlclusive DiW effort in there you won't find anywhere, anywhere, anywhere else. Oh, there's a link on the Albums page, near t'bottom. 30/07/06 Man, look OUT! Two new gigs for August as DiW comes crawling back out of the woodwork. Check LIVE page for details. They're both Newcastle, sorry. 30/05/06 Hey Scotland, the gig on the 9th Joon in Edinburgh has had to be postponed a little bit, but will be re-arranged for July. So just you watch out! 24/04/06 As part of an accelerated rollout of digital Delivery vehicles that encourage viral distribution of featured content via a mobile music strategy acquiring the optimum demographic conjecture, click on yonder go-kart for some free DiW ringtones. 04/04/06 It'll be May 8th for the new album release date, you dig. 'Albums' page for details, son. 16/03/06 Cock-outs: Goto LIVE page for latest tour additions, LISTEN page for new download, and ALBUMS page for latest release info, all updated. 14/03/06 Cheers to the boyo Stevie Lamacq, DiW gets another Radio 1 bit of airplay with The Breeders. It's like a birthday oir summat. 13/03/06 Some new gigs on the Live page to bother you. Includes one in Scotland. 18/02/06 Two new gigs to disappoint you with: Check the Live page! 11/02/06 New live date added for Newcastle.... See the LIVE page, eh? 15/01/06 The DiW UK Roadshow may be stiffing a town near you soon, as Simondo goes into Touring Mode, hopefully, in Springish time. You're a promoter, somewhere in the Country, you say? Get in Touch!! This is being arranged at the moment so we need's your help. Mail info@distractionrecords.com if you fancy some action, sailor. 29/12/05 Got one of these stupid idiots now: www.myspace.com/dressedinwires There's not much there that's not here, so don't get too excited. 21/12/05 Hey Hey! get your FREE DiW Xmas download, from the Listen page ("Download Of The Month" section. You'll lap up the special Xmassy version of Young Porkers, as featured at the White Room gig the other day. Get it while it's holy! 20/12/05 New DiW releases clogging the pipeline: 1) Pay attention to the forthcoming DIY compilation from Fake Indie Label which will feature an exclusive, and fairly exciting, new track; coming soon; details to folluh; 2) the next NEW DiW album is gathering churlish momentum and will be with us all, whether we like it or not, possibly Feb-ish; coming soon; details to folluh; and 3) There are also absurd rumours of a limited edition cassette-only single released by a hot new label on the block; coming soon; details to folluh. All of these releases will be coming soon, keep checking back, as details will folluh. 10/11/05 HOT NEWS - Wednesday 16th November, Newcastle University, Kid Carpet: DiW has been confirmed as poor support. 28/10/05 Distraction weekender photos are now online, a gallery is accessible through the Live page! No fer t' faint hearted. 22/10/05 North-East compilations are all the rage, and ther'll be another one out before the end of the year - details to come... expect another exclusive DiW track in there amongst all the good stuff.... 15/10/05 Death By Audio, the mighty fine compilation that it is, is to be released on 13th November, Cumberland arms, newcastle. Go, See! 01/10/05 Foundation nightclub in Newcastle will have a treat on 15th November - it's a gabbatastic extravaganza with Knifehandchop heading the festivities. DiW will provide inadequate support. 01/09/05 Legends Of All Places in Newcastle is the place to be on 14th September, for that hotly awaited ceremony of ceremonies; the Annual Insangel Awards! Simondo is a Shoe-In for the coveted trophies of Bestest Solo Artist, Bestest Fancy Male, and outrageously, Bestest 'Website'. There'll also be a short DiW performance during the festivities, whether they want one or not. 20/08/05 'Nuther new date confirmed, Cumberland Arms on 13th October, supporting the Extraordinairie Carnivale of Hoots that is the GOD ALMIGHTY Thomas Truax. 17/08/05 DiW in Hot Radio 1 Action! Congratulations to Disc Jockey Huw Stephens, who had the forsight and guile to playlist 'The Breeders' on his show on 16th August. You're a bally Gentleman, Sir! Apologies to any minors listening at that time, but you should've been in bed by then, anyway, anyways. 04/08/05 Seeing as the Time For A Deathkill compilation, by those Bubble Projecteers, was such a success, there'll soon be a follow-up: 'Death By Audio', featuring the hottest of the hottest from all over t'North Eastern. Watch out, there'll be another exclusive Dressed F*nny Wires track on there. Due out in a couple o' months or so. 07/8/05 New Date: It's a laptronica night at the White Rooms in Sunderland. 06/8/05 OK, there are 3 new DiW releases now. it's 3 different 3-track EPs which aren't very much money, go to the Albums page to see what we got. 01/7/05 Oh Christ, this month's issue of The Crack has a 2-page DiW centre spread. Akimbo! 26/6/05 "Fishin' Songs" has now been withdrawn from the Sage listening post, as a small child took offence to some swearing on it, and it made Baby Jesus cry. 24/6/05 Wow, You can hear DiW classic "Fishin' Songs" now at the listening library of the Sage Gateshead! Excellent! 21/6/05 The photos from the Darlington gig are so special, they have their own page. Go and find it, mon! 15/6/05 Confirmed for the next HipsterDeathkill event. July 16th, in Sunderland. Saturday night. Voodoo roomoo. 06/6/04 What, you've ALWAYS wanted a Big Black Cock for your desktop background?? IT IS DONE. Click on that go-kart over yonder. 16/5/04 North Easterners - look out for next June's Get Rhythm Magazine for exclusive Simondo Interview action! Well worth £1.50. 8/5/04 'Behold My Mighty Star', oh it's a collector's item for the future sure enough, WILL VERY SOON BE available through normanrecords.com. Hopefully, some of the other bobs of work from DiW's chequered past will soon be released through these gorgeous people. It's what's called International Distribution. Cock on! 2/5/04 Guttural DiW side project, 'Pleas', has an album out today on Bear With Me Records. Look out! See if you spot it anywheres. 2/5/04 The Big Black Cock of Death EP, whilst selling quite nicely, is now available through the wonderful people at Normanrecords.com. (Record of The Week!!) Also check the Distractionrecords.com fancy-boys to see a list of all the beautiful shops across the UK where you'll find this effort. Go gan! 28/4/05 Check distractionrecords.com video page - you'll find a free download of the gleefully gormless video of 'The Breeders', by Retina Glitch. Don't try none of it at home! 25/4/05 Today! Is Big Black Cock Day! Hurry to pick up your copy of the DiW vinyl of joy - the first 50 copies of this release includes a special free badge, and a DVD copy of the video for 'The Breeders'. Crikey how lucky are youse. 25/3/05 Check out www.bearwithmerecords.co.uk. the DiW imprint is all grown up, and is excited. 25/3/05 Clickerdy-Click on the Go-kart there. The TREATS page has a new treat - a whole, free, DiW album for you to download! Although it's a live album, which stinks of sell-out. But it's not selling out if it's giving it away, ask your mum. 20/3/05 The Selfish of the Cunt are returning to Tyneside on may 12th... If it's of no consolation, DiW will again be playing support! The Cooperage on the Quayside will be perfect. Come along on down! 16/5/05 New gig, May 20th at The Cluny Upon Tyne (and up a bit). Possibly summat to do with the Orange festival thing, or summat 15/3/05 Watch out at the next Pivot/Step/Pause event, Casino Club in Newcastle, June 12th. DiW will be DJing. 4/3/05 Gets even more exciting, there's 2 new Bear With Me album releases from The Boy Wires in the pipe line. Do keep up. 3/3/05 RPM record shop in Newcastle, 5.30PM? 25th April? It's an instore appearance by DiW for the launch party of the Black Cock EP. I wonder if they'll let me break stuff up. 28/2/05 The Big Black Cock of Death EP, 12" pictue disc of course, is on its way to the appropriate East-European pressing plant/sweat shop for your pleasure. release date pencilled in for 25th April. 1/2/05 The Forum in Darlington sounds nice. There'll be nice gigs in this new place. Sadly, DiW will also be playing. It'll be in June. 24/12/04 Sorry, off-line for aaages. Back breifly. Go to MP3 page for new buggery to try & make up for it. NEWS?! Look out soon for the first DiW vinyle release, you can play it on your record players! The Big Black Cock Of Death EP will be released mighty soon on Distraction Records. It will be 12 hot inches, and be a picture disc. I hope it doesn't cost them too much! 5/10/04 New Live date confirmed, Oktober 17. Guess where, you'll never guess? Gan to t'Live page wi'yer. 25/09/04 MORE free advertising?? At least it's not a pop-up. After a busy summer writing for The BBC Radio 1 show, Milk Run, Straitjacket comedy return in October on October 9 as part of the Newcastle Comedy festival, you are invited to the Tyneside Cinema Digital Lounge for another chance to see episodes 1 and 2 of our sketch show.The soundtrack includes local music from Sefelt, Dressed In Wires, Tears of Abraham, meandthetwins ,Blackflower and Dead Man Walking. Another Tyneside cinema show by Straitjacket will be happening in early 2005,which will include new material. www.straitjacketcomedy.com 19/09/04 Atten-Hut! A last minute gig arranged for Tuesday 21st - at Newcastle Uni! Shall be playing with the touring Japanese noisemakerers THE POLYSICS, with Caro Snatch also playing. Come! 19/09/04 http://www.cityfm.org.uk/ is the place to be horny, It's a radio station broadcasting for a few weeks on 107.5 FM across Newcastle and Gateshead, and streaming on-line. You can't miss the Distraction show from 8-9pm on Tuesdays as it'll be gooey. They may well be playing some DiW stuff, and you will be able to hear somewhere the new ad jingle i was comissioned to record for the Walter Wall Carpets big weekend sale. Don't be daft! 10/09/04 The exciting news is a 12" EP picture disc which will be out by t'end-o-year. So there. The tracklising is being pondered at the moment, hopefully there'll be a brand new piece of meat on it for you. You'll see. 20/08/04 There's an i-n-c-r-e-d-i-b-l-y exciting new release coming shortly from another proper record label... You may have to raid your attic in order to enjoy it. details to follow. 15/08/04 Click on the Go Kart over there, from now on there'll be special treats for you and your loved ones. 10/08/04 "It Brings Out The Beast In Me" and "Fishin' Songs" are out and about. New albums are always lovely. 30/07/04 New issue of Wire magazine ("New Adventures In Made-Up Music" lists the forthcoming Distraction Weekender as its must-see gig of the month.... in alphabet terms. New issue of The Crack however chooses to describe DiW as "abnormal". They mean well. 20/07/04 The new albums are coming! Just being finished off! Be not so impatient! Some should be ready for the Distraction Weekender, so gets your pennies ready for then.... 15/06/04 Some reviews on the reviews page. 29/05/04 Some free Advertisement? Here'y'go : Straitjacket Comedy hope you are all well and ready for our Edinburgh preview show. We have a Free night at the Tyneside Cinema Digital Lounge in Newcastle on July 3. Soundtrack by Sefelt, Dressed In Wires (he's the best, oh he is), Tears of Abraham, Blackflower and Dead man walking. The action Starts at 8:30 pm,be there early to get a seat! Tyneside Cinema www.tynesidecinema.com 0191 232 8289 Saturday July 3 8:30PM 10/05/04 New live date added, for this Saturday! That is, 10th May, that is. 07/05/04 Anyone heard of the Garden of Earthly Delights? Dunno, but DiW is 3rd in the May charts, whatever that means. See here! http://gardenofearthlydelights.homestead.com/CHARTS.html 07/05/04 There be a new review on the reviews page 03/05/04 Some new MP3s have appeared 28/04/04 Hurrah, the site is updated again following the DiW phone connection being unceremoniously severed for a time. No news other than that there's a whole TWO new albums in t'pipeline: 'It Brings Out The Beast In Me' will come in May, closely followed by 'Fishin' Songs'. Same old, same old. 25/04/04 The May 31st Insangel alldayer is now at The Archer in Newcastle, not the Head of Steam. That means less places to hide maybe. 20/04/04 Estrunax have grandly released the album 'Behold My Mighty Star' with a proper catalogue number and everything. Worldwide distribution no doubt. Check their site via the Links page and purchase your official DiW album today! 06/03/04 The Live music section of the Straitjacket Comedy night at the Side Cinema may be laid face down in the water, dead and limp, but the evening will still be corking (3rd April). The films include some DiW tunes (I'm told), and there's many other things of interest (I'm told). This is their press release : Straitjacket will be showing two episodes of their sketch show, which features music by Sefelt, Tears of Abraham, Dressed in Wires ,Black flower and Dead man walking. Support will come from comedy mentalist Mcdada and other local comedy artists. The night will also have unique film collaboration between the post rock band Sefelt and Straitjacket. Side Cinema (opposite the Akenside Trader, near Treacle Moon), 9 The Side, Newcastle Upon Tyne (0191 261 0066) 8pm Free 05/03/04 New Live dated added for April 27/02/04 For those who just cannaet stand those 3-month waits in between new DiW releases, now there's a blinking buggery Live album to soothe pains. A recording of the January outing at the Cluny, Dressed In Wires Ruined My Birthday is available in t'usual places. 23/02/04 Artistic new photos from the V/Vm gig adorn the Live page. 23/02/04 The March 30th gig will be at the Stout Fiddler, Newcastle. Hoots, Mon! Or, summat. 21/02/04 Oh dearie, if you go to www.distractionrecords.com and the Sounds page, you'll see a video clip from the new Sky One show, When Dressed In Wires Attacks. Terribly embarrassing. 14/02/04 Ahoy, New MP3-o-the-month on the Listen page, and also a special treat. 13/02/04 The March 30th gig WON'T be at the Dog and Parrot, as they found out i was coming and have burned their entertainment license. An alternative venue is being hunted, so watch this here space here. 06/02/04 Fine record shop that Steel Wheels in Newcastle is, they have decided to stock the Girly and Beefy albums - Check the new electronica section upstairs and get your fivers out. 16/01/04 I'm reliably informed bits of the album to be released on the Estrunax label are in Berlin somewhere for some reason... But the CD is finished and currently scaring some French people. Job's a good 'un! 15/01/04 DiW suddenly in demand? Check LIVE page for 2 new gigs - thanks to Phil Insangel, of whom it should be pointed out he DOESN'T actually wear women's clothes. 15/01/04 See Mine head swell: Not only has the V/Vm gig been made the BBC.co.uk Experimental Gig Of The Month, it is also featured as a selected Live Event Preview in the Jan issue of Wire magazine. ("Adventures in Made-Up Music") 13/01/04 Quick drunk news a go-go: There are probable new gigs in pipeline for April (Cluny again) and March (Doggy Parrot yet again), check Live page for 'details'. And the Head of Steam have repainted their walls. Silly Sods; have they NO regard for local art? 05/01/04 Work gathers apace, sort of, on the 6th DiW album... But don't expect nowts before the Spring due to the exciting new concept of 'Quality Control'. Which may be employed. Or may not. Also news will follow soon on some exciting new Simondo side projects due to surface soonish. 05/01/04 Some sexy new mp3s uploaded for yr pleasure! Also! There's a new 'Download-O-The-Month' feature - a full classic track which is so exciting. Grab em while they're holy. 01/01/04 Dressed in Wires has become the first act to be confirmed for the 2004 Distraction Weekender, August 7th/8th. But PLEASE don't tell anyone cos it might be still a secret. I'm promised a prime-time slot this year, too... 29/12/03 January issue of The Crack carries a corking preview of the forthcoming Cluny gig, featuring a peculiar DiW paragraph by the Fletchmeister. "Gives good gush" ? ? 12/12/03 Thanks to EEC funding (nah), The site now has its own webspace all paid for... so expect more niggly updates n stuff. Give me a few days to upload the mp3s, and also a few new ones and extra treats to 20/11/10 A new collaberaberaberation aberration for you! DiW vs Telos, free download, click that pic there for your fill. enjoyable! 17/05/10 get ready, coming soon - new telos EP! Oh yes! With VIDEOS and REMIXES and the whole lot. 22/04/10 oh balls, lost all the news from the last year, daft deleting bastardhead. gone forever! 13/04/09 YES YESY ESY YES it's time for a new DiW single!! And Observe This New, Curious Beast : available FREE for 2 weeks : http://www.megaupload.com/?d=STCUAX37 22/01/09 CHECKY CHECKY OUT the the shop page, there's plenty stuff now available as MP3, which SOME OF YOU might be tempted by, for reasons best kept to ye'sens. 30/10/08 Yes Yes Yes! It's time for another remix album from our boy Telos!! Click there in on the left, you'll get yours all right. 20/09/08 There's a facebook group for us now, have a search for us on there and add. probably'll get updated more regular than this shat. 14/09/08 We's too good to youses. ANOTHER Telos download single, the final one of the album. More free download treats coming very soon, stay tuned! 15/06/08 OOOOH new Telos single as a free download, grab it! available as long as you see the clicky-link there on the left. 31/03/08 meh, the paypal buttons were a bit shit so we got rid of 'em and replaced them with something that works. 29/03/08 The new TELOS album now available for orders!! Check our shop section. ALSO we have mp3 versions available, if you're a young one. Thanks to our new pardners at SoundFlare for that. 09/03/08 Christ on a spike! At last you can now buy our releases via Paypal in the Shoppe section. ('Get a Hold'). Cards out! 25/02/08 OK Beeachies, the new TELOS single is out and up and downloadable! Free! For two weeks only! 02/02/08 Relase date for the NEW Telos album!! Nightend will be in the shops... 31st March. Oh, get excited for this one, it's a monster doozer. 28/09/07 Look out, Telos is putting the finishing touches to the 4th album. "Nightend" will be out, later this year. 05/02/07 Brand new digital download single today from Telos! Grab it! Only avalable for 2 weeks!! 02/02/07 check out what an amazing new www.dressedinwires.co.uk site, oh my, oh my! oh my!